Fear is For The Birds

I'm scared of birds. 

My family thinks I don't like birds, but that's really not true.

They terrify me.  I think they might want to peck my eyes out.  I don't know how much it will hurt.  Something about the way they bob their heads around just freaks me out.

So when we visited Deer Park last summer you can just imagine how excited I was to find out that they have something called "The Budgie Barn".  That's right friends, a whole barn full of scary little birds just waiting for me to come in & get my head pecked off.

My husband & kids were thrilled.  They love birds.  They marched right up to the concession stand and bought these little tongue depressors that were covered with bird seed.  Apparently you're supposed to carry them into the Budgie Barn so that the birds will come near you.

It all sounded like something out of a Steven King novel to me.

To their credit, my family gave me an opportunity to back out.  To my ears, it sounded something like this, "It's okay Mom.  We'll just go and enjoy this experience without you.  You can stand outside and have your panic attack.  We don't mind.  We'll come find you later- when our fun is over."

You know where I'm going with this, right?

I had to put on my big girl panties and get myself in that Budgie Barn.

I took a deep breath & followed the family in.

I am not kidding or even exaggerating when I tell you that those birds swarm you as soon as you walk in.  They know that you're holding a brand new tongue depressor and they want it.

When I felt the birds landing on my head I nearly died.  Several landed on my arm and when I saw them I felt paralyzed.  I couldn't walk any further.  My heart was beating so fast and I felt tears brimming at the edges of my eyes.

My kids & I experienced an immediate role reversal.  Katie & Mandy grabbed my arm (the one without birds on it) and led me into the barn.  I heard them saying, "It's okay Mommy.  You're doing just fine."  Ken was smiling at the three of us encouragingly and pointing out all of the beautiful colors that the birds were wearing.

Katie told me not to worry. I heard my own advice coming back to me as she said, "Just wait.  You can't stay scared forever.  It will get better any second now."  And she was right.  My heart rate slowed and I was actually able to see that the birds were beautiful.

New victims visitors entered the barn and some of the birds moved on to attack welcome them and I didn't feel so overwhelmed.

Ken managed to snap this picture of us in the barn.

Friends will recognize that my smile is a little strained. But I'm there.  I'm in that barn with my family and because I conquered that fear I got to be in the picture.  I got to be part of the memory.

Conquering fears is hard.  Dig deep and find a good reason to be brave.  In fact, find several reasons to keep going.

Why do you want to conquer your fears?